Hi derek
It does indeed sound like the gear box output seal has failed,if the gerabox oil is running down inside the paralever.If it is,then it can be replaced with the gearbox in situ.The manual says you need a special tool(puller BMW 00 8 590)to remove the seal.You may be able to use a hooked tool to get behind it and pop it out.Though i cant see how far recessed it is.You will need to remove the paralever arm to do the job,no big deal really.I,ve recently done a gearbox input seal on a friends S,not for the faint hearted as you have to remove the gearbox which involves removing the rear of the bike.C frame included!I didnt use any special tools as the seal could be prised out with a screw driver and a deep 24mm socket acted as a drift to get the new seal to seat.
Check the level when the bikes flat on the ground(both wheels).You may have overfilled it.You are correct in that the level should touch the bottom threads of the filler neck.
The oil your using is fine.My mates started leaking when he changed to synthetic oil(mobil).Its like water,so if a seal is iffy it will find a way past.
I would double check where the leak is from first,it could be coming from somewhere else.Check again to make sure.If it is gearbox oil it will stink!
I would come and do it for ya.But i dont think you paying my airfare and hotel bills would be cost effective!
all the best
gus