zoo keeper

ianbcr · Post by **ianbcr** » Thu Oct 31, 2013 3:19 pm

A bloke starts his new job at the zoo and is given three tasks. First
Is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds.

As he does this a huge fish jumps out and bites him. To show who is
Boss, he beats it to death with a spade.

Realizing his employer won't be best pleased he disposes of the fish by
Feeding it to the lions, as lions will eat anything.

Moving on to the second job of clearing out the Chimp house, he is
Attacked by the chimps who pelt him with coconuts.

He swipes at two chimps with a spade killing them both..
What can he do? Feed them to the lions, he says to himself, because
Lions eat anything...

He hurls the corpses into the lion enclosure.

He moves on to the last job which is to collect honey from the South
American Bees.

As soon as he starts he is attacked by the bees. He grabs the spade and
Smashes the bees to a pulp.

By now he knows what to do and shovels them into the lions cage because
Lions eat anything.

Later that day a new lion arrives at the zoo.
He wanders up to another lion and says "What's the food like here?"

The lions say: "Absolutely brilliant, today we had Fish and Chimps with
Mushy Bees

big rob · Post by **big rob** » Thu Oct 31, 2013 4:32 pm

this little ditty had us 'roaring' with laughter

YouTube · Post by **Paul** » Thu Oct 31, 2013 7:22 pm

Very good. The variation I heard had him first cleaning out the aviary where he was attached by the finches, which he beat to death with the spade and fed to the lions, to give the punch line of "finch and chimps and mushy bees".

I'll get me coat...

Blackal · Post by **Blackal** » Thu Oct 31, 2013 8:10 pm

A Family went to the zoo . The zoo only had one animal...a dog .

>

>

>

It was a shit zoo

Al

bobtail · Post by **bobtail** » Fri Nov 01, 2013 12:15 pm

Blackal wrote:A Family went to the zoo . The zoo only had one animal...a dog .

>

>

>

It was a shit zoo

Al

Ah yes the old ones are the best

Bikerhoss · Post by **Bikerhoss** » Fri Nov 01, 2013 12:58 pm

bobtail wrote:Ah yes the old ones are the best

I'm sure Al will be delighted with that compliment

johnny 5 · Post by **johnny 5** » Fri Nov 01, 2013 6:52 pm

He He chuckle chuckle..... funny

el-nicko · Post by **el-nicko** » Fri Nov 01, 2013 8:28 pm

bobtail wrote:
Blackal wrote:A Family went to the zoo . The zoo only had one animal...a dog .

>

>

>

It was a shit zoo

Al
Ah yes the old ones are the best

they not old if you not heard 'em before.

el-nicko · Post by **el-nicko** » Fri Nov 01, 2013 8:32 pm

big rob wrote:this little ditty had us 'roaring' with laughter

Me too. (see wot u did there Rob

)

The Teutonic Tangerine · Tue Nov 05, 2013 11:17 am

Ah yes the old ones are the best

[/quote]

And the most grateful