WOMEN ALWAYS GET IN THE LAST WORD

Got some humour to share? The stage is lit and the microphone's live.

Moderators: Gromit, Paul, slparry

Mitch1100
Member
Posts: 995
Joined: Tue Apr 23, 2013 9:00 am
Location: Tasmania

WOMEN ALWAYS GET IN THE LAST WORD

Postby Mitch1100 » Tue May 22, 2018 4:57 am

REVENGE

'Cash, check or charge?' I
asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.
As
she fumbled for her wallet, I noticed a remote control for a
television set in her purse.
'So, do you always carry your TV
remote?' I asked.
'No,' she replied, 'but my husband
refused to come shopping with me,
and I figured this
was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.'

WIFE VS.
HUSBAND

A couple
drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically,
'Relatives of yours?'
'Yep,' the wife replied,
'in-laws'

WORDS

A husband read an article to his
wife about how many words women use a day.
30,000 to a
man's 15,000.
The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men.
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?'

CREATION

A man said to his wife one day,
'I don't know how you can be
so stupid and so beautiful all at the
same time.
'The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain.
God made
me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid
so I would be attracted to you!


WHO DOES
WHAT
A man and his wife were having
an argument about who
should brew the coffee each
morning.
The wife said, 'You should
do it because you get up first,
and then we don't have to wait as
long to get our coffee.
The husband said, 'You are in charge of
cooking around here and
you should do it, because that is your
job, and I can just wait for my coffee.'
Wife replies, 'No, you
should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee.'
Husband replies, 'I can't
believe that, show me.'
So she fetched the Bible,
and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several
pages, that it indeed says
'HEBREWS'

The Silent
Treatment

A man and his wife were having
some problems at home
and were giving each other the silent treatment.
Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would
need his wife to wake him
at 5:0 0 AM for an early morning
business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the
silence, he wrote on a piece of paper,
'Please wake me
at 5:00 AM.' He left it where he knew she
would find it.
The next morning, the man
woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight
Furious, he
was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him,
when he noticed a piece of
paper by the bed.
The paper said, 'It is 5:00
AM. Wake up.'
Men are not equipped for these kinds of
contests.

God may have
created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece
2009 HP2 Sport...sold
2006 R1200s with yellow rim tape
2008 Ducati Monster S4RS Tricolore..sold
2004 R1100s BoxerCup Replika..sold
2006 Subaru WRX STI S204 #318/600

Return to “Humour”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 62 guests